Dealing with Survivor’s Guilt (Part 2) by Tapas Fleming

A person who survives something terrible often thinks things like:

“It could have been me – why wasn’t it?”

“I can’t be happy because that’ll mean I don’t care about the people who died,”

“I need to be mournful or miserable to be part of this community of survivors.”

“I need to keep hurting inside to stay in touch with the person or people who died that I love – I’ll lose my connection with them if I don’t.”

“I don’t know how I’m supposed to be in this moment, so I better be somber and quiet.”

They also may be feeling grief or guilt that feels like it will go on forever.

Photo of Sue Maahs of Oregon City. (Photo by Rob Finch/The Oregonian)

To clear these up with TAT, the person puts all of whatever’s there for them (for example, everything above) into a “bundle” or “pot” – the “place” where we put things to be healed.  Then they do all the Steps of TAT about what’s in the “bundle” or “pot”. Instructions for the TAT protocol is available for free at

It’s also great for a survivor to do the TAT Pose and have a silent conversation with who or whatever comes to mind about the whole incident. They’ll be feeling deep relief in no time!

Wishing everyone love, peace and endless happiness,


NOTE: If you are new to TAT, click here for an excellent interview with Tapas to give you an overview.

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